Sunday, 16 February 2014

Being Sick-Coping with my illness

Strange things happen when you get sick-people look at you a bit different.  I walk with a cane now and that adds a certain spark to the look in peoples eyes.  I am 39 years old and walk with a cane.  Who would have guessed?

I have wonderful people in my family.  Sometimes you don't see extended family as much as you wish and you underestimate the amazing help just being around people that have known you forever.  No sorrowful looks there.  Plenty of emotion, but none are sorrowful.  Emotion boils out in rants about the health care.  We could draw a Venn diagram of people who don't like the health care system in Saskatchewan and people who have never used the Saskatchewan health care system.  They don't intersect. 

Don't get me wrong.  I am terribly grateful for the system we have in some ways.  My kids have broken numerous bones and had some wicked brushes with some rough stuff.  And until now if someone would have asked, I would have said we had it pretty okay.  Now that is a bunch of hooey.

I am not a really difficult person to please, I really am not.  I enjoy being a fairly happy person.  I have a touch of the Pollyanna complex.  The problem that this creates is that most people think that I am okay with everything that has been going on.  I am NOT.  I hate how I have been treated.  I hate how many doctors appointments I have left in tears.  I hate how much time every single little thing takes.  I feel like they are stealing my life two weeks at a time.  It's not fair.  Quite simply, it just isn't.  It isn't fair to keep people waiting while they get sicker and sicker.  How much damage are my tremors causing?  Are they going to ever go away?  As long as my pain is under control no one really seems to care. 

I am not okay with this.  There are only 1 million people in our glorious province.  We should be able to look after ourselves.  Do you want to save millions of dollars a year? Get the computer system up and running.  For the love of God it is 2014 and I have waited 2 1/2 months now for my test results.  That is unacceptable.  And frankly down right cruel. 

So to everyone who thought I was okay with my illness and coping alright, I'm really not.  I just don't want to dwell on it.  I also don't get to talk to people very often so I don't want to scare you away. 

In my boredom, I have been working on a new website.  This is the link.  Nothing would make me happier than everyone going over and having a look!

Thank you again for you all reading my blog!  There are thousands out there and I thank you for caring about me!